Wednesday is Garbage Day

We always look forward to garbage day at our house. It matters not what the boys are doing -- when they hear the truck coming down the street, they drop/stop whatever they are doing and run to the window to watch!

A Day Last Week

Sundown Last Night and Sun Up this Morning

So, Happy Hanukkah! We celebrated last night by lighting the candles. Of course, Sam was so sure they were going to set off the smoke detectors that he spent most of the lit-candle-time on the front porch eating popcorn. Periodically, he'd stick his head in and say, "Are they out yet?" Finally, we convinced him to come in and watch the pretty candles. And, the smoke detectors stayed silent! So, tonight we lit the candles again and he was much more participatory and really enjoyed watching the candles burn.

Gus is pretty much oblivious to the candles, but I'm okay with that. An almost-2-year-old and an open flame are not my idea of a good combination. Here he is running AWAY from me trying to take his picture with the candles and yes, those are Sam's feet running away too.

No presents yet, saving those for when Grandma Carol arrives Wednesday. Don't tell, but the boys are getting a train menorah! It's so cute! They'll get some chocolate too. I mean, really. What's Hanukkah without a little chocolate? Gus has already started on the chocolate! He's got a mild brownie addiction that I'm pretty sure he gets from both sides of the family. Here he is with his brownie pack that he demanded by saying, "More, more brown, brown."

This morning we ran another 5K race. The Reindeer Run!

Ozzie had a great time of 30:13. I was a little slower which is frustrating seeing as I'm the one who actually runs on a (semi)regular basis and he does not. At all. But, good for him and I'm glad he's going to races with us. It's so nice to have something the whole family can do together. Grandma pushed the kids in the stroller again and at the end both boys got out and ran across the finish line!

Sam even wore Grandma's number pinned to his shirt:

AND they came in third place in their age group so they got a medal! What a hoot! Beth and Michael were there today too. Beth ran and bested her last time by 10 minutes! Fantastic! Michael spectated.

The Family that Runs Together...

Forgot to mention that we all did the annual Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving. Ozzie and I ran and the boys rode in the double stroller with Grandma at the helm. It was a great way to start the day and reminded us of how much we have to be thankful for...

Perfect Teeth

So, Sam and Gus rang in December with trips to the dentist. Gus had his first ever check up and he passed with flying colors! Seems my boy has perfect teeth. Excellent spacing -- which, I've learned, is fantastic for avoiding cavities. No need to floss, the dentist said. GREAT! Got to love a dentist who tells you not to worry about flossing.

The next day was Sam's turn. Sam's an old pro at going to the dentist at this point. He's been for three or four check ups and for an emergency trip due to some tooth trauma -- he knocked one of his front teeth back behind the other on the side of his bed. Ouch! But this was just a check up and it went as well as Gus's. He hoped up in the chair (with a little coaxing) and let the hygienist clean his teeth. The dentist came in and proclaimed that Sam has perfect teeth too -- I've heard this before, but never tire of it. Again, don't have to worry too much about flossing, but a little more with Sam than with Gus as Sam has more teeth and presumably eats more. Ha! If we're basing our need to floss on food consumption I may better reconsider the flossing policy for Gus.

Gus Makes a Bad Day Good

This morning didn't start out so well. Sam didn't want to get dressed for school and Gus didn't want to do anything but distract Sam. By the time we got out the door a half-hour late, we were all frazzled to say the least. In the driveway Sam refused to get in the car and Gus was spinning circles in the -- to make himself dizzy. It worked because he fell. Flat on his face. Poor guy emerged from the rocks with cuts and scrapes all around his eye. He was fine, but mad as a hornet. Finally we got Sam to school and instead of going to the park to run like we normally do, I decided I'd take Gus and my bad mood home. I hoped Gus would play quietly while I took a break. Gus loves to be the only kid home and have free access to the toys. I got him settled with some golf clubs and a ball and found myself a fudgesicle in the freezer and sat down on the couch to enjoy the fudgesicle and the (relative) quiet. I zoned out until pretty soon Gus was standing in front of me saying "Bite? Bite?" with the sweetest, most hopeful look in his eye. So, what could I do, but share my fudgesicle. He stood there enjoying the fudgesicle and between each lick he said, "Bite?" At one point he said, "All gone" and walked away. But instead of walking all the way away he walked around the coffee table to the other side of me and climbed up on the couch and backed himself in to sitting right up against me. He looked up at me and said, "Kiss" and gave me a big, fudgesicle smooch, smiled and said, "Bite?"
I couldn't help but laugh. I kissed his sweet curly-haired head and felt the bad day turn good.

No School Today

This morning, Sam woke up excited there was no school and ready to take his allowance (for keeping his jammies dry -- GO SAM!) to Target to buy a tank (don't ask). Sadly, Sam soon learned that in addition to and before going to Target he would have to come to exercise class with me and then go get a flu vaccine. He's not pleased and has since taken to my bed.

Out of the Mouths...

Today when I was putting Gus down for his nap he kept saying, "Go away." He'd look up at me, smile and say, "Go away." He said it over and over and over until I shut the door. Funny boy. Usually he just says, "Night, night." I'm just thankful he's taking a nap at all. Last week he was threatening to give it up all together and I'm just not ready for that.
Not to be outdone in the cuteness category by his little brother, Sam, at bedtime had a few clever things to say too. We read, Are You My Mother by P.D. Eastman and when we finished I asked him if a snort was his mother. He said, "No, you are. Snorts are just good for putting things back where they belong." Then as we were discussing his likes and dislikes for a school project, he said he disliked, Cheez-Its. Really? He couldn't think of anything else he disliked.

Sadly I can't finish this post with Halloween pictures as I forgot the camera. I know. Anyway, after saying they were going to be trains for weeks, five minutes before we left the house, Sam decided to be the pumpkin he was last year and Gus followed suit. So, another Halloween goes on the books, but just not on the record. And so it goes...

The Kitty and the Tickler

Sam has decided that he is a kitty. Today he requested that I serve him his milk in a bowl so he could drink like a kitty. Yesterday he had his water in a bowl. Gus has taken to tickling himself and others. He lifts his own shirt (or the shirt of the person nearest to him) and says "tickle, tickle" as he tickles his belly (or the belly of the person nearest to him). What can I do but serve up Sam's milk in a bowl, allow Gus to tickle my belly and wonder what imaginative adventures tomorrow will bring? I'm the luckiest mommy in all the world!

A Picture's Worth

Sam has recently discovered the joys of photography. Lucky guy! He gets instant gratification in this digital age. How wonderful it must be to be 4, to take a picture, and to see the image right away. Imagine the imagining his growing mind can do with that. It's why the Polaroid was so popular, I suppose. And, it's why I happily turned the camera over to him one day last week and let him capture the view from his perspective. A sample of what he felt was worth a thousand words...

That last one is my favorite! Happy Friday, everyone. Hope you have a picture perfect weekend.

The Rainbow Diamond

It’s been two weeks now since Sam’s been back to school and started soccer. Two weeks! He loves soccer. LOVES soccer! Here's a picture from his first practice:
The headless guy is his coach -- and we couldn't be happier with the coach! He's so great with the kids and upon meeting him for the very first time Sam gave him a hug. The coach was taken aback (in a sweet way) and so was I. Sam never does that! He never hugs upon first meeting. I'm taking it as a good sign.

In the past two weeks Sam’s already had two soccer practices and a game, done some homework (looking for “A” words, cutting them out and pasting them in his Alphabet Journal), started a reading log and had his Snack Day – which doubles as Show and Tell. Very exciting among the preschool set! Sam brought in what he calls his “rainbow diamond.” It’s really a silly acrylic trinket of mine that sits on the bookshelf in our living room.

For whatever reason, he loves it. Last year he took it for Show and Tell at least once too. The friends in his class that saw it last year would like to see it again, he said. He was very sure of this so I didn't argue. He's been very sure of himself going to school this year. He even let me take his picture on the first day! At home and at school in front of the sign!

That morning, there were remarkable levels of cooperation going on and a confidence that is heretofore unmatched. It was so exciting to see him walk into school and into his classroom with that much confidence. We had talked the night before about being a friend to some of the kids that would be new to his school and I think knowing that there were other kids there that were feeling nervous helped him to feel more comfortable. And, of course, it helps that he loves his school and that I love his school. How could we not? Love and sunshine and happiness ooze from the walls there. Walking through the doors is like walking into a gigantic hug and the place is full of magic and rainbows. The teachers and the staff there love those kids – each one of them. It’s amazing and it’s small enough that all the teachers get to know all the kids – even the ones in other classrooms. They take the time to know each child’s quirks and needs and they do whatever it takes to make them comfortable. When Sam and I arrived there last year (mid-semester) damaged and wounded from our previous preschool experience, every member of that staff swooped in and bandaged and reconstructed us and gave us as much time as we needed to trust them and love them and feel comfortable with them. They welcomed us, they tended to us and they made us feel at home. They were so gentle with Sam and helped him transition into a class full of kids that had already been together for more than two months. He was never an outsider in that class. They never dismissed him as a quiet kid. They saw through his reserved exterior and sensitive soul and they nurtured him so he could let his inner self shine as bright as his rainbow diamond. They helped to alleviate his fears of fire drills and they picked me up off the floor in the hallway, dried my tears and gave me reason to believe in them and believe he would be safe there – that whatever emotional damage had been done at his old school would be undone here. And it was. He’s proven that over and over again for the last two weeks as he sings in the car on the way to school and he hugs Gus and me good-bye at the door and walks into class with his head held high. He’s even doing the afterschool program two days a week. Music and gymnastics. He loves them both! We started with just gymnastics, but after the first day he asked if he could stay after school again. When I asked him if he wanted to do another day he told me he wanted to do “all the days”! That’s not in the budget right now so he’ll have to be happy with two – besides, I need him to spend some time with me before he goes off to big boy school! Of course, I’m thrilled he wants to be there. And, I’m thrilled that he wants to bring a silly acrylic diamond to Show and Tell so he can show his friends the rainbow that shines inside.

Some Things about Gus

Gus was born 13 days before his scheduled c-section and that landed him in the neo-natal intensive care unit instead of in my arms. He shouldn’t have been in the NICU and I firmly believe he was being held for ransom – because we certainly had to pay a number of extra bills for services we didn’t want and, our pediatrician has confirmed, that we did not need. What we needed was to be together – which the hospital insisted on making impossible. Ozzie had a fever and was banned from the NICU. He was also banned from me because they wouldn’t allow me in the NICU if I was exposed to his fever. Most of the time I was alone in the hospital room and the nurses wouldn’t answer my calls. They would miss my medication doses and ignored me for almost an hour after I had thrown up in my own lap. They told me they were busy with mom’s who had babies. I did have a baby and wanted to see him, I told them. They told me they didn’t have time to help me with that. They also insisted I had to have a wheel chair to visit the NICU, but could never seem to make a wheel chair available. After repeatedly being ignored I stumbled out of my room to the nurse’s station and – through tears – demanded to be given some pain medication and some access to my child. I was told to use the buzzer if I needed something and to never get out of my bed without permission. I screamed at them in horror until one of the nurses took pity on me and gave me my long overdue dose of pain medication and took me to the NICU.
In the NICU the nurses there chastised me for not coming sooner or more often. They handed me paper work that told me they would communicate with me openly and often and then they moved the baby to another section without telling me. They performed medical treatments that they did not discuss with me and they made it clear that they believed that I had no rights or no input regarding the care of my child. Save for one very kind nurse, they were horrible. They were condescending and used guilt to pressure me. They treated me as if I were a teenage mom with a heroin addiction and spoke to me in such a way that indicated that they believed my baby would die if he were to be placed in my care. They made me watch a series of mind-numbing parenting videos and only let me feed him if I could force-feed him a prescribed amount of formula in an allotted amount of time. One nurse, who was hopped up on some sort of energy drink, pushed me out of the way while I was changing his diaper and told me I was taking too long. She also took him and his bottle away from me and said he needed to hurry up and finish so she could take a bathroom break. And before they let me bring him home – which they told me was against their better judgment – they strapped him into his car seat and made him sit in it for an hour. All this for a 7 pound baby who was not sick. I know how important the NICU is for families with sick babies. I know that lives are saved and I do value the work that hospitals, doctors and nurses do. I realize that these are often tiring, thankless careers performed by people who are often overworked and underpaid, but that does not excuse even for a minute the poor care and treatment that I received and it does not make it okay to needlessly keep a newborn away from his family.

He was born on a Wednesday, but didn’t get his name until Friday because I wasn’t allowed to hold him and I desperately wanted to hold him, to know him before I named him. I finally named him on Friday after pressure from the hospital records clerk who said she would have to submit his name as “Baby Boy” if I did not. I would have had to legally change his name and that, she said, was a process I would not want to go through. So, I named him. Gus Weaver. Of course, we had discussed names, but sadly, Ozzie wasn’t there for the final decision due to the aforementioned fever. On Sunday, after ridiculously sitting in his car seat for an hour, Gus was finally allowed to come home. He got to meet his brother and see his daddy and he was finally able to be in my arms – which he loved and so did I. In those early days, Gus loved to be with his mommy. In fact, both Ozzie and Grandma said they felt like he didn’t like them because he only wanted to be with me. I knew that wasn’t the case. We just had some catching up to do. And that’s what we did. Now, going on two years later we never think about those first four days. I can’t. I get entirely too angry and rather than stew about something I cannot change I choose to focus on the fact that Gus did finally get to come home, that he was and continues to be healthy and that we get to spend every day together now.
Ozzie and Grandma no longer question whether or not Gus likes them. It’s clear he loves them. A couple of weeks ago he even said “I love you” to Ozzie. If given a choice between the two of us, he picks his daddy. When Ozzie comes in the door Gus squeals with delight. The only person he prefers to Ozzie is Sam, who he follows around and emulates and idolizes. Gus loves to wear shoes and as soon as he’s dressed in the morning he pulls out his shoes and insists we put them on him whether we are leaving the house or not. “I go,” he yells and then puts his arms behind his back and runs forward as if he’s flying. He says, “night-night” and puts his head in my lap when he’s tired. He climbs into the refrigerator when he’s hungry. He loves to eat protein: eggs, meat, chicken, shrimp, yogurt, but doesn’t have much time for fruits or vegetables. He’s a huge fan of applesauce and insists on using his own spoon. It’s clear he’s not missed many meals and, due to being carted around at odd times to accommodate his brother’s schedule, Gus believes that he is supposed to eat every time he gets in the car. He plays golf most days and claps and says “Yeah” when he connects the club with the ball. Trains are his passion because they are Sam’s as well. He refers to every animal he sees as Riley and usually at the top of his lungs. He’s not much for swinging, but sliding suits him just fine.

He’s a really, really good sleeper and he’s always happy to take a bath and brush his teeth. When he finishes brushing his teeth he says, “Ding!” A trick he’s learned from his brother. He doesn’t say “no”, but he says, “uh-uh” and it means the same thing. His current favorite book is Dr. Seuss’s The Foot Book, but really, any book will do as long as it is a book and it is being read to him and he can turn the pages. Both boys love books. I pray that love lasts a lifetime for them. He is happy and agreeable and so easy-going, but on the rare occasion he’s perturbed he can give a really mean stink-eye that involves scrunching up his nose. He’s a master Swifferer and always offers to help clean up then claps and cheers after he’s put something away. Oh, he’s sweet and gentle. Our gentle giant. He’s curious and impish and sometimes downright feisty. He jumps on the bed with wild abandon then flops back on the pillows and points the remote at the TV. He likes to push the buttons on the phone and sometimes will talk in it. He is usually up for an adventure and each day with him is an adventure for me. “Oh, wow!” he says when he sees something full of wonder and when he’s given something, he says, “Thank you”. He looks so big in his crib, but seems so small when I look into his big, blue eyes. He’s an amazing, precious, wonderful, miraculous gift from heaven and he makes me feel all gooey and sappy like my heart is bubbling over with love and rainbows and sunshine and unicorns and butterflies and fairy dust, for good measure.
He’s worth it. He’s worth those four horrible days that he was kept from me and I’d do it all again if it meant that was the only path to Gus. As bitter and as broken as that path was it led to one of the sweetest, dreamiest, delicious, gooey baby boys a mom could ever hope for.

Beginning with the End

It’s the end of summer at our house. We have one week left before Sam starts school. Prekindergarten. Known as VPK around here. Gone are the lazy mornings that are interrupted only by even lazier afternoons. Gone are Gus’s late morning naps as we’ll be heading to Sam’s pick-up line right about the time Gus begins to rest his weary head in my lap. And, sadly, gone are Sam’s all day pajama fests. This may be the hardest of our summer habits to break.



When school let out in May, Sam declared this a summer of jammies. He intended to wear jammies all day, every day, he said. And he was true to his word unless he was instructed (strongly) to dress in “real” clothes. He knows his jammie-clad days are numbered as we’ve begun the back-to-school process: buying school supplies, shopping for new shoes for his ever-growing feet, and having discussions about new teachers and school friends. However, just because he knows the fun is ending, does not mean he will give it up willingly. Sam is a boy who loves to be cozy and he’s coziest in his PJs. The t-shirt material shorts I’ve purchased for him don’t measure up and not even his pink t-shirts have had much wear over the past few months. My guess is that by next summer, Sam will be too grown up, too self-aware, to don his sleepwear to the grocery store or out for lunch or to the playground. So, while he’ll be giving up comfort when he trades his pajamas for his back-to-school clothes, I’ll be relinquishing another part of my baby to the boy he is becoming. I’ll have to tuck the Summer of Jammies into my most precious memories and hope that as he grows from a boy and then a teen and ultimately a man that he will have a lifetime of the Summer of Jammies, or its age-appropriate equivalent, to keep him feeling cozy and secure.



In addition to wearing jammies, we took our first family vacation this summer. We went to Sea World. Of our 6 vacation days, we spent three at Sea World. It was fantastic. Having the option to come and go from the park at our leisure as opposed to trying to cram it all into one day was ideal. There was no pressure. We were able to see the shows we wanted to see – we all agree that Shamu does indeed rock – and feed the dolphins and ride the tot rides (Sam rode a roller coaster TWICE and LOVED it!) and relax as we went from exhibit to exhibit. We managed to do all we wanted to do and we did it without stress. We also played the carnival games and Sam won a couple of pink Shamus. Perfect!

Gus happily went along and enjoyed the times he was able to get out of the stroller and run around. He won’t remember our first family vacation, but he will have the satisfaction and the benefits of growing up in a family that makes a family vacation a priority.

Gus let his hair grow this summer revealing a crown of golden curls that earns him a great deal of attention wherever we go. We’re considering getting him his own publicist to control the crowds and book his appearances. He’s expanding his vocabulary and exhausts himself daily trying to mimic, emulate, keep up with and impress his big brother. To Gus, Sam hung the moon, his daddy roped the stars and our dog Riley captured moonbeams in a jar.

We’ll enjoy this last week of lazy, jammie-clad days. The boys will play golf and trains and jump on my bed. We’ll come up with spur-of-the-moment adventures just to get out of the house and we’ll try to organize a final play group at Chuck E. Cheese. It will go too fast – even though we’ll savor its sweetness – and then we’ll be back in the swing. Sam will start school and soccer, Gus will come with me to Baby Boot Camp, to run and to run errands. He will also go to open gym at the gymnastics studio and maybe take a music class. Ozzie and I will get some projects completed around the house before he gets busy again with work. And, I will be forced to address the fact that this is Sam’s last year of preschool and my first-born-son will be off to kindergarten (REAL SCHOOL!) in less than a year. Yikes. Just thinking about it is enough to make me want to spend the total of this next week in my... (you guessed it) ...pajamas.